My coffee is lukewarm. I don’t drink it often these days, but when I do it is always lukewarm, at best.
The world is loud. A busy and chaotic storm. And social media, it screams all the louder.
My feed fills with a variety of things— from friend’s highlight reels, to the most recent political article, to the do’s and don’t’s of baby raising. These posts, they make me feel as though I am doing it all wrong.
Put your newborn to bed drowsy but awake.
Encourage self soothing habits.
“Eat. Play. Sleep.” is the ultimate goal for optimal baby happiness.
Rocking your baby to sleep will create long term dependency.
And don’t you dare co-sleep.
My tongue tie baby and I, we have broken every rule.
This stressed me out for a while. The articles, they had me convinced I was setting myself up for long term sleep deprivation and a child who will be overly clingy (and maybe, maybe I am?). For a number of reasons, the tips and the tricks just did not work for us. And I search for a voice, somewhere among the posts and their comments, who validates this feeling I have, that it really is okay to just do you. Whatever that looks like.
That voice is hard to find.
But in this moment, in my darkened bedroom with the steady whirr of the fan and the occasional creak of the rocking chair.. it is ok.
In this particular season, I can do this. I can be here for him. I need to be here for him. This is, in fact, my one biggest job right now. And what a gift that ability is, to fully give myself to it.
All too quickly, he grows before my very eyes. Independent sleep will come. The run I long to take, the floor I want to mop, the unrushed shower I miss.. it will all come back again. My baby, he will grow up.
And I imagine that all too quickly, I will long to relive the days I spent rocking him to sleep, and breaking all the rules in the process.
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I’m dusting off the keyboard, resetting old passwords, and sharpening the pencils again.. with hopes of resurrecting this little blog of ours. These posts will more than likely contain very different content than they used to, and will most likely primarily consist of my random writings and musings. There is an unsubscribe option if your inbox feels overly full these days, but know that you are more than welcome to continue joining us on the journey 🙂
Love. Praying for you during these days. You’re writing paints vivid images that pier into the windows of your life. Love you guys! Give Liam a squeeze for me!
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So, congratulations!! I think we missed the baby announcement along the way. Take it it’s a “he” and that all is well!! Anita Keys
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You just keep doing you!! You are a great mom and know I’m praying for you daily!!!!
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Yes, one day it’ll all be a pleasant memory… So make up your own rules!!!
After all, I don’t remember YOUR mom obeying any rulebook, and you guys turned out pretty good 🙂
You – and Liam – are perfection just the way you are, fearfully & wonderfully made. ❤
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I always adored the middle of the night baby and me time! I am blessed to hear you enjoying it,, keep it up!
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We love you and liked your blog! You, Liam and Stephen are in our prayers! You have made good progress! We know it hasn’t been easy, but you have preserved! 🥰❤️❤️❤️
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Nice to read your words again! My babies are 57 and 53 but I relived your moments with you! Carolyn from Wesley Church
Carolyn 🌹 Mom 🌻 Grandma 🐶
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So beautiful are those special Mommy baby times. Glad you are sharing your precious memories with us. Enjoy💕
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Love that you are recording your moments once agian in word descriptions. Took us right there, rocking with you in the the rocking chair… We love you guys and are pleased to hear you are settling into parenthood very nicely. (We KNEW you would!) Hugs!
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